The news of the day in late night was Jon Stewart’s Daily Show renewal. And then the ninjas of late night went to work, delivering a master class in slicing up the juiciest carcass ever to flop himself down in the country’s kitchen.
The shutdown, the bathroom renovation, the garish Gatsby gala in the face of a food shortage, the truly bizarre fascination with catapults and toilets, it was a festival of pure presidential excess that all but screamed out for unremitting late-night mockery.
And wow, did the hosts deliver.
Stewart went straight from thanking viewers for making a 31st season possible to unleashing what looked like legitimate, righteous fury over the contrast between food assistance being denied and… pardons for an apparent mystery-man billionaire, a spectacular misinterpretation of The Great Gatsby, millions for tearing down a chunk of the White House, and redoing a historic bathroom as something out of a Vegas gambling emporium.
It was almost too much for Stewart, who launched into some of the most pugilistic punchlines he’s ever delivered.
Like disputing House Speaker Mike Johnson’s claim that Trump is “big-hearted” with that AI video of Trump in a fighter jet: “He did just dump diarrhea on all of us.” Or savaging the Gatsby party slogan, “A Little Party Never Killed Nobody,” as proof none of the planners had ever read the novel: “The party killed somebody! Two bodies!”
And then the knockout: “Your premiums may be going up. Tariffs may be shutting down your small businesses. You may be losing your food assistance. But it’s all OK. Because Donald Trump is building a ballroom that looks like the inside of Marie Antoinette’s vagina.” (Cut to a gold-festooned artist’s rendering.)
Jimmy Kimmel also tore into the staggering incongruity of denying food to children while hosting a costume gala for the wealthy. “It might be the Trumpiest Trump move of all time.” He offered new nicknames for the president, including “F-Sharp Fitzgerald,” “Tacky Robinson,” and “Darth Renovator.”
Stephen Colbert joined in, zeroing in on the dancer wriggling inside a giant martini glass: “Mr. President, there’s a shutdown. Read the room. There are people in this country sending their children to bed without a bite to eat—or a woman to drink.”
The party proved irresistible fodder for late-night writers—which raises the question: why are the comics, not the press, the ones calling out one of the most tone-deaf spectacles of the decade?
One can only imagine what flights of fury the President will be driven to by the relentless pounding over his Roaring Twenties party, his “Lincoln Bedroom with a view” bathroom renovation, and his oversized new ballroom. He’s already branded these hosts “losers and scum.” He might even try to have them arrested—as he more or less did just days ago with Seth Meyers.
Over the weekend, Trump unleashed a particularly splenetic screed at Meyers on social media. Between calling him the “least talented person ever to appear live on television” and insisting he hadn’t watched the show in years—despite having posted about it earlier this year—Trump somehow found time to tune in again and declare Meyers “a deranged lunatic.”
Trump has gone after Meyers before, usually as the “least” of the comics who mock him, ending—as always—with “no talent, no ratings.” Meyers has typically ignored these tirades. But this one went too far—not because of the insults about his ability, but because Trump accused him of talking “endlessly about electric catapults on aircraft carriers.”
That could not stand. “I’m not the one who talks endlessly about catapults on aircraft carriers!” Meyers shot back, before rolling an astonishing montage of Trump obsessing over electric vs. steam-powered launchers—dozens of clips flying by in rapid-fire succession.
“Ask my friends,” Meyers said, pausing to define friend for Trump as “people who enjoy spending time with you independent of the financial and legal favors you can grant them.”
It was a meticulous, hilarious takedown—and Meyers didn’t even need to highlight Trump’s closing claim that he’s “100 percent anti-Trump, which is probably illegal!!” Instead, Meyers delivered his rebuttal with a grin: “You can say whatever you want about me. That’s your First Amendment right—which I have too, right?”
Translation: No, it’s not illegal.
It is, in fact, gloriously American to mock the pomposity and blowhard tendencies of politicians—as late night demonstrated across the board Monday night. And a reminder to those who try to intimidate great comedians: they always hit back harder. Much harder.
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Why are the comics calling the shots? And standing up against the voice of tyranny? You ask. Because we have lost the media. Comics are the ones fearless enough to stand up to the hyenas and patriotic enough to serve as a voice for the regular folks.
Then, they’re doing the work of their idol and hero, Bernie the Bum Sanders, which leads to their audience believing both Democrats and Republicans are the same. Thus, lading to Republican victories out of indifference!
Good job of helping fuck the country up, douchenozzles!😠😡🤬