Stephen Colbert may not yet know his post-Late Show plans, but he has at least one hometown job offer on the table.
The outgoing late-night host is being lured in by the National Marine Mammal Foundation, which has made a job offer to Colbert the center of their latest campaign.
The nonprofit—which works to protect marine mammals, humans, and oceans through scientific research and conservation efforts—has erected billboard messages aimed at adding Colbert to its team of field biologists who operate out of the host’s native Charleston, S.C.
“Wanted: Former Late Show Host, burdened by whale-related childhood ambition,” reads one.
Another is even more direct: “ATTN: Stephen Colbert: What size flippers do you wear? Asking for the dolphins.”
The ads, which are on display around the Charleston area, also feature the hashtag #StephensNextJob and a link for Colbert to apply to the position on the NMMF website, which also features a long letter to the Late Show host.
“You said, publicly, repeatedly, and perhaps dangerously close to manifesting, that you always wanted to become a marine biologist,” the NMMF’s letter notes.
Indeed, Colbert has claimed that entering the field was an early childhood dream of his—until his own biology intervened.
“I always wanted to be a marine biologist,” he told The Post and Courier in 2006. “But then I had this ear problem. I have no ear drum. So I had this operation at the Medical University when I was a kid. Now I can’t get my head wet…. I can’t really scuba dive or anything like that. So that killed my marine biology hopes.”
From the sound of it, Colbert wouldn’t exactly stay dry if he takes the NMMF gig. The org’s field biologists are “on call 24/7 for sick and injured marine mammals,” and lead “critical research to better understand dolphin health” and the surrounding ecosystems.
Though the foundation notes they “wouldn’t complain” if Colbert decided to sign on full-time, it says the main focus of this campaign is to raise awareness for its work in Charleston—something it hopes Colbert will help them shine a spotlight on.
“If this bold outreach accomplishes anything beyond mildly alarming your publicist,” the NMMF’s letter reads, “we hope it helps more people discover the incredible work happening here in Charleston to protect marine mammals and inspire the next generation of conservation leaders.”
The opportunity is also open to local students interested in marine science (they can also apply on the organization’s website), and it’s likely they won’t be facing much competition from Colbert.
In recent interviews, the late-night vet has said that he isn’t planning his next gig until The Late Show wraps, though that clock is very much ticking. Colbert ends his nearly 11-year this Thursday, May 21.
If he does envision a future in the waters, he may want to consider adding “It’s Raining Fish” to his resume.
He should take the offer.
Working with sharks, electric eels, piranhas, venomous jellyfish, and killer whales.
Don’t be a coward all your life, Colbert!
Perhaps you should apply, seeing as you waste your loser life trolling on boards, like this, for your Dear Toddler Drumpf!
it’s a downward spiral for the United States whose citizens elected a over the hill old man who called the press and other countries citizens which includes the United States derogatory names, yet he’s so thin skinned that he can’t stand the truth about himself
CBS couldn’t stand up to a criminal convicted pedophile bully. I will like to know if they really believes that removing Colbert and installing Byron Allen will survive that time slot.
I’m calling on everyone who watches Colbert to boycott that time slot on CBS.
damn, you’re insanely cringe
Damn, you’re fucking stupid!
btw it’s mostly democrats in the epstein files but you’re such a partisan hack that i don’t think you can handle that
if you’re going to call politicians pedophiles, make sure you’re doing it for your OWN people too, mmkay?
your two party system disgusts the entire rest of the world
Guess what stupid! Most of the pedophiles in America are Republicans like Drumpf! You still think Dershowitz is a Democrat? He sided with Republicans foe a long time now!
And if you say Bill Clinton, guess what? He asked for all the files to be released unredacted, and insisted his testimony about Epstein be broadcasted live and out in public! Does that sound like someone who has something to hide?
You filth are fucking pathetic! You’re due for a very hard rain!
I know you want me brutalized, although I kinda wonder why. Not really, but yeah, a little bit.
I hope you find peace and whatever the pain is which brought you to this point fades so that you can rest and enjoy a peaceful spirit.
❤ from Midwest USA.
And I want you fucking crippled for that! I hope you get arrested and your life in prison a living physical nightmare, scum!
oh, last thing
“over the hill old man?” aren’t you describing your beloved Biden?
You deserve to have your big mouth smashed in with a brick!
You are fantasizing about smashing someone in the mouth with a brick? Quite a violent imagination…I think I remember you from the penny smusher page.
Stop skullfucking little boys, bitch! Prison’s gonna love beating the fucking shit out of you, scum!
Yup, you’re the violent dude obsessed with pedophilia. With so many thoughts of harming others that you don’t even know, especially children, I imagine life must be difficult. Please know healing is possible. Peace!
Figures!
I hope you are joking, but I wonder as abusing children is never funny,
No surprise!
I don’t recall ever encountering someone so focused on children being harmed .
I’m sorry.
Keep your head on a swivel, scum No one likes remorseless pedophile who project their sickness onto others!
What makes a scum like you so focused on harming children? Answer my question, fuck hole! Don’t be projecting like you lowlifes do!
You are either someone who is trying to be funny or looking for shock value or a truly disturbed and dangerous individual. I hope for your sake, and the sake of others, it is the former.
I hope you find peace.
Better fucking keep your head on a swivel, scum! Justice is coming for you!
I hope you get smashed to pieces in prison,bitch! That’s the fate of remorseless pedophiles, like you!
You may well wish harm comes to me, all hough I have no idea why you would. I still hope you find healing and experience peace. You can skip the pedophile jokes or fantasies, or lived experience, or whatever it is you keep circling back to. Know that hating those around you (epically those you have never met) and wishing then harm will tear you down. You are not string enough to continually battle this,, no one is. This must cone from a place of deep hurt and I am very sorry you were abused, or whatever the chain of circumstances which brought you to this place has been. You have walked a hard road and I am so sorry for that. Please get help before you harm someone. Whatever happened to you was was wrong, and it will be just as wring for you to continue the cycle by harming someone new. Life does not need to be a continual battle. I truly hope you are able to find rest in your heart of hearts and that no one else is abused before you do. ❤ from Midwest USA.
How I’d love to smash your face in with a brick! You’re such a fucking remorseless ghoul!
That is a threat which is illegal and sufficient for legal action.
I know! Laugh at it’s evil ignorant face for believing it can threaten me!🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
I feel sorry for you. I hope you find comfort in this chaotic world.
❤ from Midwest USA.
And that you get savagely beaten up every day in prison, you fucking rotten scumbag! No mercy for evil people like you, filth!👿👿👿👿👿
Apologies, I posted my reply the the wrong thread by mistake.
We have seen foreign football fans physically fighting fans of the other team after a game. To bring up politics, pitting one side against the other leading to verbal fighting, makes as much sense. The ones shouting the loudest, or first, are the ones who won’t listen, won’t read, and won’t suport saving whales or rain forests.