“Where’s Johnny Carson?”
With exactly six weeks to go until Election Day, the whereabouts of a late-night legend who passed away in 2005 is one of the big questions on Donald Trump’s mind. Or at least it seemed that way on Monday night, when the former president made a campaign stop in Indiana, Pennsylvania, and spoke for roughly 90 minutes.
While he made sure to hit upon all his favorite talking points, including yet another nod to the false—and dangerous—assertion that Haitian immigrants are dining on people’s beloved pets in Springfield, Ohio, Trump saved several minutes to complain about late-night television. And this time, he took aim at more than just Jimmy Kimmel, his most frequent sparring partner; Jimmy Fallon and Stephen Colbert were also on his fight card.
First up was Fallon: “Remember that guy?” Trump asked the crowd, without citing “that guy” by name. He recounted the story of his infamous 2016 visit to The Tonight Show, where Fallon asked to touch the soon-to-be president’s hair, and caught a lot of flak for it for years to come. Before getting to the meat of the story, however, Trump offered up his opinion of The Tonight Show and other late-night talk shows, saying “They’re all dying.”
“Where’s Johnny Carson?” Trump asked. “Bring back Johnny!” (It’s unclear whether the presidential candidate knows that Carson has been dead for nearly two decades. This is, after all, the same man who praised the work of famed 19th-century abolitionist Frederick Douglass—seemingly in the present tense—in 2017.)
Trump went on to note how what he sees as a lackluster lineup of late-night hosts on the major network shows really makes one “appreciate the greatness of Johnny Carson.”
“These three guys, they’re so bad. All three of them,” Trump continued about Fallon, Kimmel, and (presumably) Colbert.
After making sure to point out that his long-ago appearance on The Tonight Show gave Fallon “great ratings,” Trump then called the host “weak and pathetic” for expressing regret over the playful nature of their sit-down. (Fallon has gone on to share that he fell into a depression as a result of the backlash sparked by the interview.)
But Trump wasn’t done yet.
Next up was Kimmel, who Trump described as “the worst host in the history of the Academy Awards” (again), “this stupid guy,” and “one of the dumbest human beings ever.” All of this over Kimmel’s Oscars stunt, in which he read Trump’s social media post insulting Kimmel live during the ceremony. (Something tells us that a response from Kimmel could be coming soon.)
Colbert was spared any direct insults, but he was lumped into Trump’s repeated claims that “all three” late-night hosts are “bad.” (So, who’s going to tell him that there are more than three?)
Ultimately, all the smack talk was just a way for Trump to talk about his favorite subject: himself, and how he just gifted Fox News’ Greg Guteld with his all-time best ratings by appearing in-studio on Gutfeld! last week.
While Gutfeld! is produced in the style of a traditional late-night show, it airs at 7 p.m. on the west coast, making “late night” not quite an accurate label. (Again, who’s going to tell Trump?)
If Carson were still around, Trump would be just as unhappy with him. Carson’s monologues were said to sway voters and even elections. He would be merciless with Trump so Donny should be glad there is no Johnny.