Jimmy Kimmel is done hearing from the people who are mad that Dancing with the Stars fans keep voting for Guillermo Rodriguez.
Rodriguez has finished last or tied for last with the judges in each of his first four weeks, only to be rescued by viewers every time. That has sparked a growing online backlash from fans who think stronger dancers are being sent home in his place.
Kimmel devoted fully half of his monologue Wednesday night to Rodriguez’s improbable run, celebrating his popularity before turning to the backlash.
He read several complaints aloud, including one saying Rodriguez “should be ashamed,” another calling him “the worst part of the season.”
Then Kimmel defended his friend with the kind of prosecutorial indignation he usually reserves for a certain resident of 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue.
“I think some people might be losing sight of what this show is,” Kimmel said. “This is not the Olympics, okay? This is not SEAL Team 6.”
“This is also not a professional dance competition,” he continued. “That’s why it’s called Dancing with the Stars and not “Dancing with the Dancers.” This is an entertainment show. The winner should be whichever team is the most entertaining.”
Kimmel then offered evidence for his case, playing a montage of fans recreating Rodriguez’s dance moves.
“That is what this show is about,” he said.
Kimmel acknowledged that dancing doesn’t exactly come naturally to his longtime parking lot security guard-turned-sidekick.
“Before this month, the only salsa Guillermo knew was on a tortilla chip,” he joked. “Asking him to do this was like asking a pigeon to win a swim meet.”
But that, Kimmel argued, is part of his appeal.
“The fact that he has been out there working so hard, rolling around on the floor, sweating, panting, shaking that adorable little ass, dancing like a star,” Kimmel said, is exactly what makes the criticism so galling to him.
“If that bothers you so much, if that upsets you so much that you feel the need to attack him online, to begrudge him even a drop of the gallons of joy he is bringing America right now,” he said, “maybe you need to get out of your little hate caves and find some friends.”
And if that wasn’t clear enough, Kimmel closed ranks around his longtime friend.
“If you want to get to this guy,” he said, “you’re gonna have to go through all of us first.”
Watch Kimmel’s full Wednesday night monologue at the top of this post.
