Less than an hour after locking fired Attorney General Pam Bondi in its crosshairs, Saturday Night Live this weekend targeted the husband of ousted Homeland Security Secretary Kristi Noem.
Earlier this week, the UK’s Daily Mail alleged that Noem’s husband, Bryon Noem, is “a secret crossdresser who dons gigantic fake breasts and pink hotpants to chat with online fetish models.” “Weekend Update” broached the allegation not once but twice, setting the stage for a visit to the news desk from Bryon (played by Sarah Sherman and, well, a pair of balloons).
“My eyes are up here. My nipples are out here,” Sherman’s Bryon informed Michael Che. “Do you have something on your mind, bud? Huh? Care to share?”
When Che declined to comment, Bryon said, “Good. Good. Because I dare you all to find one thing that’s comical about this whole situation. I dare you to make a joke about my big, beautiful balloon breasts. I dare you to kink-shame me on national TV about my insane clown juggalos and tiny, teeny little pink bike shorts.”
Bryon not only challenged Che to say something inappropriate, he invited “cue cards guy” to comment on “my bimbo bazongas” (longtime SNL and Late Night with Seth Meyers cue-card lead Wally Feresten held up a card that simply read “NO”), followed by “my wife Kristi Noem” (a shotgun-cocking Ashley Padilla), and SNL boss Lorne Michaels (though all we saw was a hastily vacated swivel chair backstage).
“Oh, and you, Colin. You got a little smile all over your face. Got a little grin,” Bryon said to “Update” co-anchor Jost. “Want to say anything about my Party City poppers?”
“I don’t want to say anything,” Jost deferred. “But if I did, it would probably be something like [makes ‘motorboating’ gesture with face/mouth].”
“Awesome, just awesome,” Bryon harrumphed, folding his arms atop his bountiful bosom. “I hope you’re all enjoying yourselves here in Mamdani’s New York.”
In closing, Bryon asked Che, “Wanna touch ‘them’em?”—at which point Sherman yanked out each of the balloons nestled inside her shirt, handing one each to the anchor.
Watch Bryon’s “Update” visit below:
Kristi Noem's husband stops by the Update desk pic.twitter.com/JvJ9GgYCHO
— Saturday Night Live (@nbcsnl) April 5, 2026
